Parenting Advice From Joy Berry: A Perfect Family Outing

As we were pulling away from the Disneyland Hotel, my older granddaughter uttered something that every parent or grandparent hopes to hear immediately following a family adventure. “Everything was absolutely perfect,” she sighed wistfully. “I had so much fun.”

Several things prompted her remark.

For starters, Disneyland is a pretty magical place. However, as evidenced by the myriad of crying children throughout the park, it can easily become a nightmare if it is not experienced properly.

I purposely chose to take my granddaughters to the park during a down time. That meant that the crowds were thinner and the lines were much shorter than they usually are. We also took advantage of the Fast Pass program as often as we could. The Fast Passes that we collected assigned times for us to return to high-volume rides where we were allowed to bypass the longer lines.

It helped that we had a four-day pass that allowed us to experience the park in small, manageable doses. It also helped that we were in an adjoining hotel that allowed us quick access to the park. When the girls grew tired of lines and rides, we would return to the hotel for a swim and snack break. This made it possible to alternate between the hotel and park from early morning to late at night.

Another successful strategy included allowing the girls to plan each day. After the plan was established, all of us agreed to stick to it unless the two girls could agree on any suggested modification. Encouraging them to work their strategy in their own way and at their own pace put them in control and also made them responsible for working together to make everything turn out okay.

There was something else that worked well. I began the four days with my promise that each of the girls would be able to purchase a souvenir of their choice on our last day in the park. I addressed every “gimme” by writing down each requested item and noting where it could be found. Then I encouraged the girls to review the list of items before making their final purchases.

In the end, my older granddaughter purchased a silver charm bracelet, my younger granddaughter purchased a special Build-A-Bear, and both girls could not have been more pleased with their choices.

Last but not least, I had no hidden agenda and I made certain that there would be no interruptions of any kind. Therefore, the girls were the complete focus of my attention. This is one of the most important considerations when it comes to successful family experiences. Parents with their ears glued to their cell phones don’t make very enjoyable or engaging companions.

The girls and I witnessed a good example of this after passing through the Disneyland turnstile. A small family was following close behind when we overheard the father announce, “I want everyone to see that I am turning off my cell phone!” At that point, the littlest family member squealed with delight while the two older siblings high-fived each other.

The girls and I looked at each other knowingly, and I whispered to them, “Now that’s the way to start a perfect family outing at Disneyland!”

To learn more about having an enjoyable time and getting along with others, read Joy Berry’s anthology, You Can Work It, from the Winning Skills series.